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| I feel sick and ashamed | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Mar 2 2016, 05:36 PM (570 Views) | |
| Nubi | Mar 2 2016, 05:36 PM Post #1 |
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I was looking for a video game quote and one of the two Google results was RPG Zone Reborn, the old forum before HotN. Wow. Ended up doing some searching and I feel sickened by my 12 year old self. Even as a "mature" pre-teen there is so much immaturity going on. But worse than that is the socially acceptable brainwashing my young mind had went through. I say "socially acceptable" because it is deemed okay to teach your offspring at a young age what is good/bad sexually and religiously. And children often accept what their parents tell them without a second thought because they haven't mentally matured enough to reevaluate and form their own opinions or sense of morals. And some people never do mature enough or rethink what they've been force fed. Heroes of the Net and all previous iterations of it changed me. I strongly believe the exposure to different cultures, opinions, and sources of information helped shape my now well-rounded perspective. Especially considering, as I grew up, I was isolated in a small town where I didn't get near enough exposure. So here's the topic from RPGZone that got me going on this tangent. [Debate] Homosexuality This pains me to direct quote... because of my grammar, attitude, choice of words, and small childish mindset fed to me by adults. Actually, my spelling and grammar wasn't too bad.
Plot twist, I'm Lesbian. (And also not a male, which everyone perceived me as at the time :P )
No, I did not think that. I was told that. Aargharbaldjadh.
Woah, woah, woah now... little Nubi, how wrong you were. "Impossible" is a very strong word for a 12 year old who had no sexual experience to use when referring to sex between anyone. Hah. I'm dying at the matter-of-factness used there. "Impossible" :rofl: Tell that to my libido! Setoshin made a post and I must ask, Setoshin do you still believe this?
Also, how does anyone debate with a 12 year old child? Sheesh. For those of you have known me through my pre and early teens, thanks for sticking around. Now, the real topic at hand here isn't Homosexuality. It just happened to be the last discussion in RPG Zone's debate forum and it brought to the forefront of my mind something I recently discussed with a lady-date. We are taught certain things growing up, usually because we're too stupid and naive to figure them out ourselves and need concrete "rules" to keep us safe. Things like "don't touch a hot stove" or "don't hurt other people" or "don't play in traffic" or "drugs and drinking and sex is bad" -- because when you're under age and can't make educated decisions all of those things really are bad at the time. But we're also taught things like... religious beliefs, racism, customized moral codes, that homosexuality is good/bad, that sex before marriage is good/bad, that evolution is real/fake, and the list goes on. Just think about a handful of things you were taught by parents and familiar adults. Some of these things unconsciously stick with us. They took root in our subconscious and we never had a need to reevaluate them. And whether we truly believe what we were taught to be correct, we can still have a knee-jerk reaction towards it. For example, I was getting to know the fantastically intelligent woman I was on a date with when she: 1. Mentioned being nonreligious and 2. Commented about evolution from scientific standpoint. My brain did this weird backflip and I had to forcibly remind myself that those were good things to me. I was raised Christian and told that evolution wasn't real (you know, like monkeys evolving into man). And even though I currently believe totally differently (nonreligious and accept the science of evolution) I still had this negative internal reaction to what she said. I had to reconcile in my brain what I actually believe with what I was taught to believe at a young and impressionable age. Other examples come to mind, but I'll end the rant here. Anyone else experience this? How have your beliefs changed as you've grown? Is it terrifying reading through RPG Zone? |
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| Setoshin | Mar 2 2016, 05:54 PM Post #2 |
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I cringe a lot at the things I used to believe in. No, I do not believe that any more and I'm no longer homophobic. I think growing up in a cultural setting that was by default homophobic just made me think that the nastiness of it was set in stone. But I read a wonderful book by Stephen Law called the Philosophy Gym that made me question it so heavily. And then when I moved to the Caribbean I was surrounded by so many homophobic people that it made me see the stupidity of hating someone for their orientation. And I think some people are born gay, some people become gay through environmental reasons, but either way it doesn't mean that it's wrong. My sexual preferences are undoubtedly a mixture of nature and nurture as well I mean the 12-14 year old me in old post would never imagined going to a gay club multiple times as I have now. Ah the folly of youth. Edited by Setoshin, Mar 2 2016, 05:56 PM.
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| Chrono T. | Mar 2 2016, 11:04 PM Post #3 |
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Master of Time and Space
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-shrug- There are a lot of things, just on this board, that I am ashamed of. Like, seriously? I was so self-centered and spiteful it is just... painful. I mean, seriously, why was I ever liked on this board? I was just a raving lunatic with serious delusions of grandeur~! Wait... was I ever liked here? ... don't answer that. I don't wanna know. Anyways... I am a lot more of a considerate person nowadays, but I still find there's a bit of the old me left, when I come onto boards and forums. I mainly strive to do things in a way that is ill-advised and act indignant when it turns out to be a terrible idea... I may still have some issues to work out. That being said? I don't remember what my crazy viewpoints used to be... although, I know that I used to be, like, incredibly racist without realizing it. I mean, like, seriously. I was legitimately surprised that Seto was black because I had been conditioned to believe that they were stuck, intellectually, the way the crows acted in Dumbo. Of course, like all of you probably do, I contribute a lot of my personal growth to the interactions I had on boards such as this. If not for that, I think... IDK... I think I'd still be a terrible person, but would be completely unaware of it... like so many of my former neighbors and friends. |
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| Setoshin | Mar 2 2016, 11:51 PM Post #4 |
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I've done some growth recently in the last year or so. I got quite politically and socially involved in university and my early 20s. I'm not saying those things are useless, but a lot of the methods and people you meet in those circles are so backward and unsavoury. I'm in the process of removing myself from them. I haven't made a political post on FB in ages and I don't feel the need to debate online. I can do in person and I'm still involved in local neighbourhood things to an extent, but fuck all that other liberal circle jerking. |
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| Nubi | Mar 3 2016, 04:46 AM Post #5 |
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WAIT -- Seto's black!? Black people have internet? :P Fortunately I don't think I ever had a racist mindset. But there are times I do catch myself kind of... generally profiling people in a subconscious way. When I started dating I quickly evaluated if I was attracted to erm "black people" and realized it wasn't even a question I needed to ask myself. Attraction varies so wildly that an entire complexion or ethnicity can't be excluded for me. Its crazy that people still believe "mixed" relationships are bad thing and makes me so frustrated. I walked into a restaurant-bar in the small rural town I lived in at the time with my black girlfriend and her immediate reaction to the environment was "I don't feel comfortable here." It took me a second to realize we were all sorts of unusual in a tiny traditional town. No one should have to feel that way. Anyway, good work realizing the racism and presumably conquering it. It's scary that a lot of people don't even notice their own behaviors or put in the effort to understand and research other view points. Seto, I'll have to check out Philosophy Gym, sounds like it could be interesting. What kind of awful experiences did you have with those political/social groups? The time I've spent visiting campuses I get the impression gung-ho college students feel justified in whatever social-crusade they are waging. And while I back a lot of the overarching ideas expressed, I noticed there are a lot of extreme and overly sensitive opinions around. Hilariously my coworker was telling me today about how someone referred to her as "gal" in an email and her upper manager (male) sent an email to her and her manager saying "Is this dude serious using 'gal'. He needs to go through sensitivity training." And he was serious. As if using the word 'gal' to refer to a lady is a bad or insensitive thing. Political-correctness to the absurd. |
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| Zanaras | Mar 3 2016, 08:54 AM Post #6 |
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That one guy from way back when
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Haha, oh, small towns. I remember when the first black family moved into our district the entire school did like... sensitivity training or something. I don't think anyone even really cared. At least, none of the students did. |
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| Setoshin | Mar 3 2016, 07:19 PM Post #7 |
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Stereotypes about black people become weirder to me the older I get. For one almost all negative popular stereotypes are designed to put down African Americans and somehow get extrapolated to black people everywhere. So being half-African and half Afro-Caribbean (not all Caribbean people are black!) there are so many things White people, both American and British, ask me about Black American culture that doesn't really apply to me. E.g. Like we don't really say the N-word at all, even in terms of endearment as it's still a horrible word in the Caribbean and Africa. Its becoming more used in the UK amongst black rappers here trying to copy Americans, but it's still a relatively rare word. Or even some discussions revolving around culture, history and politics can't be extrapolated. Obviously some similarities exist, but there's a lot of generalising from people who don't really know the difference. And then pretty much all of the African Americans I've met on my travels have been really nice and normal. In fact Americans as a whole come across a lot more intelligent and polite than what the media and culture depicts IMO. I think Americans think they're more stupid and uncouth than they really are. One thing that is true, is that you guys are so fearful when you travel. Americans panic way too easily. And your politicians are insane. But aside from that I don't mind Yanks. |
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| Setoshin | Mar 3 2016, 09:51 PM Post #8 |
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More or less close minded behaviour and rhetoric. I agree with a lot of their beliefs to an extent, but I don't believe in a one size fits all response to every slight -- which doesn't align with some of the more oversensitive sorts. Also, the groups are massive echo chambers that don't encourage scrutiny of ideas. And then whilst I don't really believe that reverse racism or reverse sexism is a serious thing (power relations are so important in these things), but some of the rhetoric is so backwards and hypocritically offensive to 'privileged people'. Finally, the fact is the groups are great for boosting awareness and encouraging dialogue. I don't knock social media at all. It's very useful. But a lot of these types focus on putting the issue out there in public but never propose or even support tangible things to affect change. They moan but are ignorant as to how to affect legal and economic change and are not remotely interested. So a lot of my more political and social leanings have moved offline to supporting community organising with clear goals in mind. So I buy locally from the neighbourhood I grew up in. I support my friend's businesses when I can. I work for a company that does a lot of tangible benefits for marginalised people. I go to local town hall meetings. |
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